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I’ll never know, who I could have been, if …

I’ll never know, who I could have been, if …

“I’ll never know, who I could have been, if…” Share your own story...

»I’ll never know, who I could have been, if…« Share your own story…

“I’ll never know, who I could have been, if…”

“I’ll never know, who I could have been, if…”

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I will never know

On going since 2004 | Participatory work in progress | Paper, see-through quilt cover and pillowcase, mattress, bed, nightstand | H 40 x W 120 x D 200 cm

Participating women*: Gisela Medzeg, Claudia, Sanne, Petra M., Gabi L., Claudia K., Gisela, Jutta, Anny, Maria Mathieu, Heike Pich, Stefanie, Johanna B. Steinmann, Johanna Claudia Christine Anna Wunder Luigg, B. M., Diana, Michaela, K., Nicole, Sabina, H., A., Silvia, Alex, Anka, Susanne, Silvia W., Ursel, Kathrin, Anne-Catrin, Salome, Die Friedliche, Caro, M., Anja K., Judith, Helga, M., P. Lv., Nora B., Adriana, Rosemarie, Anna P., Irmgard G., Larissa and all the women who sent texts anonymously


Participants’ contributions – the poems and prose they write, and the stories they tell – breathe life into this project and make it grow. For me, it is vital to involve victims-survivors of sexual violence in expanding the spectrum of remembrance and visibility.

The work consists of a bed, a mattress printed with snatches of speech, and a see-through tulle quilt cover and pillowcase. Visible inside the pillowcase is my statement: I will never know, who I could have been, if…

Beside the bed is a locked nightstand into which victims-survivors who visit the exhibition can drop their own texts and memories, anonymously. The nightstand is emptied daily. I also receive victims-survivors’ stories by email. All these poems, memories and texts are carefully wrapped in the delicate, see-through tulle quilt cover, which gradually fills; and they are also published online. Since 2004, countless women an girls have shared their personal experience of sexual violence by taking part in this installation or writing an email to me.

The stories bear witness to the horror that children in our midst face day after day. They bear witness to the failure of society as a whole, and of individuals in particular, to face up to these crimes. And they bear witness to the courage, anger, and resourcefulness of the victims-survivors, who carry on living, day after day.

If you want to contribute, you can send me a poem, a line or two, a longer story, or several texts by email – just as you like, with or without your name: kontakt@renatebuehn.de